Birthday

I just had ANOTHER birthday. Really. Wasn't the last one only a few weeks ago? The best part was my 14 year-old bringing me breakfast in bed. It was enough food for six men, but I had to eat it all: scrambled eggs, pancakes, coffee cake, coffee, and then a cake he made from scratch. I call him Kramer - after the Seinfeld character, because you never know what he will come up with next.

Just the week before, he was in the er getting stitches in the bottom of his foot - from stepping on a food processor blade in the middle of his floor - at 1 am. (Note the "Kramer" resemblance)

It was an interesting phone call with the pediatrician later that day, when I had to ask for pain meds (remember, this man has DHEC or DSS tailing me)

Him: "What happened to Joe's foot?"

Me: "Uh, he stepped on a food processor blade, which was lying on his bedroom floor."

Him: "What was he doing with a food processor?"

Me: "Uh .. he and his brother were chopping up beef jerky?"

Him: "At 1 am?!"

Me: "Well... they do have rather odd sleep hours...."

Him: " Beef jerky. It's a Charleston tradition. Okay - I'll call in something for the pain." (Unsaid to me: "- and add this to the report I am compiling on you continually asking for pain meds and amnesiacs for your kids. First Versed - now this.")